Title: Days of Becoming, Chapter 17 - "All Saints Day"
Author: Talktooloose
'Verse: X-Men movieverse
Warnings: Swearing, spiritual dislocation, long speeches and explicit sex.

Series Summary: This novel focuses mainly on the paths Iceman and
Pyro take on their way to adulthood and how they discover and deal
with their love for each other. It is a novel about what Joni
Mitchell calls "the dream's malfunction" and how we can learn to make
our own dreams when our heroes fail us. Other X characters (including
ones from comicverse and elsewhere) and OC's play prominent roles and
the action begins before X1, continues through the events of X2 and
X3 and concludes in the aftermath of that movie.

Chapter Summary: Bobby fights for John. Xavier reveals the mansion's
secrets.

Betas: Mo and Lux Apollo. Invaluable input on brownstones and drugs.

Disclaimers: Marvel and 20th Century own this stuff but they keep
messing it up.

Notes: Well! Two updates in less than two weeks! That's not gonna happen
again! Expect 18 in January. Happy holidays, everyone. I'll be writing; I
promise.

I LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU. Please use the comments link at the end of
the chapter to bring you back here or drop me email to the above
Address.

The chapter can be found at:
http://toothdemon.net/ttl/fanfic/dob/chapter17.html

Earlier chapters can be found at: http://toothdemon.net/ttl/fanfic/dob/

Title: Days of Becoming, Chapter 16 - "Pumpkin Stew"
Author: Talktooloose
'Verse: X-Men movieverse
Warnings: Swearing, extreme fatigue, bad telephony and explicit sex.

Series Summary: This novel focuses mainly on the paths Iceman and
Pyro take on their way to adulthood and how they discover and deal
with their love for each other. It is a novel about what Joni
Mitchell calls "the dream's malfunction" and how we can learn to make
our own dreams when our heroes fail us. Other X characters (including
ones from comicverse and elsewhere) and OC's play prominent roles and
the action begins before X1, continues through the events of X2 and
X3 and concludes in the aftermath of that movie.

Chapter Summary: The night of changes continues as Bobby rushes to
answer the call of destiny.
Betas: Mo and Lux Apollo. Invaluable input on brownstones and drugs.
Disclaimers: Marvel and 20th Century own this stuff but they keep
messing it up.

Notes: A big, fat glacier of a chapter named '16' calved off this
smaller chapter and renamed the rest of its mass '17'. Yes, that
means Chapter 17 is already written and should be posted very, very
soon.

I LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU. Please use the comments link at the end of
the chapter to bring you back here or drop me email to the above
address.

<http://toothdemon.net/ttl/fanfic/dob/chapter16.html>Here's the chapter!

<http://toothdemon.net/ttl/fanfic/dob/>Here's the DOB homepage for
earlier chapters!

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Hi everybody,

I wanted to let you know that September's author interview is now up at
the Wolverine and Rogue Fanfiction Archive
(http://www.wolverineandrogue.com/wrfa/viewstory.php?sid=2084) for your
reading pleasure. So, swing by, take a look and enjoy!

Diane

Title: Days of Becoming, Chapter 15 - ³The Yellow and the Black, Part 2²

Author: Talktooloose

'Verse: X-Men movieverse

Warnings: Swearing, misery, revealing hospital gowns.

Series Summary: This novel focusses mainly on the paths Iceman and Pyro take
on their way to adulthood and how they discover and deal with their love for
each other. It is a novel about what Joni Mitchell calls "the dream's
malfunction" and how we can learn to make our own dreams when our heroes
fail us. Other X characters (including ones from comicverse and elsewhere)
and OC's play prominent roles and the action begins before X1, continues
through the events of X2 and X3 and concludes in the aftermath of that
movie.

Chapter Summary: At the Turcott Clinic and at the Spiderhole, things go from
bad to worse. And aren't you supposed to feel better when the heroes arrive?

Betas: kuriadalmatia, mofic and lux_apollo. Thank you for your precision and
commitment.

Disclaimers: Marvel and 20th Century own this stuff but they usually let
hacks mess it up; so we're obliged to write fanfic.

Notes: I ret-conned the structure of the novel to divide it into books.
Chapters 1 through 6 now comprise Book 1 ("Wake-Up Call"). Book 2 ("From
What I've Tasted of Desire") begins with Chapter 7 and ends with this
chapter.

The betas, as usual, were immensely helpful and I've ignored a different
strongly held point of criticism from each of them this time. Sorry guys,
it's my funeral. Lux, especially may be disappointed that I handled his
"that's too crude" criticism by making it cruder. *sigh*

In strange coincidence news, I'm publishing a Halloween chapter in the same
week as Halloween. SPOOOOOOOOKKKYYYYYY!

I LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU. Please use the comments link at the end of the
chapter to bring you to my LiveJournal or drop me email to talktooloose ATTT
livejournal DOTTTT com.

The chapter can be found at:
http://toothdemon.net/ttl/fanfic/dob/chapter15.html

For earlier chatpers, visit the the Days of Becoming homepage:
http://toothdemon.net/ttl/fanfic/dob/

October's interview will be with September, author of such stories
as "Through Touch," "Two Weeks," "Swashbuckle...and Leather Slippers,"
and the "Therapy" series among others. You can read her stories at the
WRFA site (http://www.wolverineandrogue.com/wrfa/index.php). People
can suggest questions through October 12th. Send them to me at the
address below.

Thanks for your interest and enjoy the new movie!

Diane
deh@...

Title: Days of Becoming, Chapter 14: "The Yellow and the Black, Part 1"

Author: Talktooloose

'Verse: X-Men movieverse

Warnings: Swearing, crudeness, smarminess

Series Summary: This novel focuses mainly on the paths Iceman and
Pyro take on their way to adulthood and how they discover and deal
with their love for each other. It is a novel about what Joni
Mitchell calls "the dream's malfunction" and how we can learn to make
our own dreams when our heroes fail us. Other X characters and OC's
play prominent roles and the action begins before X1, continues
through the events of X2 and X3 and concludes in the aftermath of
that movie.

Chapter Summary: Happy Halloween! Bobby and Kitty are trick or
treating in the wrong way while they part at the Mansion takes a
surprising turn. Meanwhile in Boston, Mike learns that there is more
to Jubilee's friends than meets the eye.

Betas: <http://mo.fandomnation.com/fic/>Mofic and
<http://lux_apollo.livejournal.com>Lux_Apollo. Thank you for your
precision and commitment.

Disclaimers: Marvel and 20th Century own this stuff but they need us
to make sense of it.

Notes: Dazzler's musical stylings by Lux. Special thanks to Pete
Chvany for information on where it's happening in Boston! I hope I
didn't mess it up.

The chapter can be found at:
http://toothdemon.net/ttl/fanfic/dob/chapter14.html

For earlier chapters, visit the DOB homepage:
<http://toothdemon.net/ttl/fanfic/dob>http://toothdemon.net/ttl/fanfic/dob

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Hi everybody,

I wanted to let you know that Skybluerae's author interview is now up at
the Wolverine and Rogue Fanfiction Archive
(http://www.wolverineandrogue.com/wrfa/viewstory.php?sid=1849) for your
reading pleasure. So, swing by, take a look and enjoy!

Diane

August's interview will be with Skybluerae, author of such stories
as "Learning to Fly," "Given," "Coffee Coffee Buzz Buzz," and the "Out
to Get Me" series among others. You can read her stories at the new
WRFA site (http://www.wolverineandrogue.com/wrfa/index.php). People
can suggest questions through August 11th. Send them to me at the
address below.

Thanks for your interest and enjoy the new movie!

Diane
deh@...

Title: Days of Becoming, Chapter 13: "Raccoon Eyes"

Author: Talktooloose

'Verse: X-Men movieverse

Warnings: Sexual situations, swearing, snowcones

Series Summary: This novel focuses mainly on the paths Iceman and
Pyro take on their way to adulthood and how they discover and deal
with their love for each other. It is a novel about what Joni
Mitchell calls "the dream's malfunction" and how we can learn to make
our own dreams when our heroes fail us. Other X characters and OC's
play prominent roles and the action begins before X1, continues
through the events of X2 and X3 and concludes in the aftermath of
that movie.

Chapter Summary: Bobby and Kitty deal with their feelings in the wake
of Lance's departure. Mike is fed up with Jubilee's new friend. What
is Christian Turcott really up to?

Betas: <http://www.kuria.onomatopoetry.com/>kuriadalmatia and
<http://lux-apollo.livejournal.com/>lux_apollo whose insightful
suggestions have made this a better chapter and me a better writer.

Disclaimers: Marvel and 20th Century own this stuff but they need us
to make sense of it.

The chapter can be found at:

http://toothdemon.net/ttl/fanfic/dob/chapter13.html

For earlier chapters, visit the DOB homepage:
http://toothdemon.net/ttl/fanfic/dob

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Hi everybody,

I wanted to let you know that UKTara's author interview is now up at
the Wolverine and Rogue Fanfiction Archive
(http://www.wolverineandrogue.com/wrfa/viewstory.php?sid=1746) for your
reading pleasure. So, swing by, take a look and enjoy!

Diane

I didn't see it listed so I forwarded Jocelyn's message about
plagerism to Wonderful World of Make Believe (WWOMB) aka "Make
Believe" to get the word out.

Sorry my first post in years has to bear bad news, but I've had a run-in
with a person who is plagiarizing movieverse stories, including fics
from xmmff.com.

Her ff.net profile is here:  http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1277121/
<http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1277121/>

Her absoute chaos profile here:
http://www.absolutechaos.net/viewuser.php?uid=1271
<http://www.absolutechaos.net/viewuser.php?uid=1271>

I recognize at least two stories by Troll Princess
<http://www.xmmff.com/stories/viewuser.php?uid=2>  which she has copied
("All Foam, No Beer" and "Boy Cooties") and I first met her when she
contacted me two days ago and tried to claim that she had written my old
xmmff story, "Last Man Standing
<http://www.xmmff.com/stories/viewstory.php?sid=267>  " a month ago.

Since I wrote that fic back in 2000, I challenged her, and she admitted
that she had posted it under her own name, but agreed to delete it.  She
has done that, but I've noticed several other stories in her profiles
that seem familiar (and too well-written to be her work), so I wanted
the Movieverse authors to know and hope you'll be able to help figure
out who the real authors of these fics are.

She has also posted copies of Troll Princess's stories on her Quizilla
page.  If anyone wants to read copies of the emails and Instant Messages
she sent me, I have saved everything.

Apologies for the ugly topic,

Jocelyn



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Title: Days of Becoming, Chapter 12: "Two Small Rooms, Part II"

Author: Talktooloose

'Verse: X-Men movieverse

Warnings: Sexual situations, swearing, staying up too late

Series Summary: This novel focuses mainly on the paths Iceman and
Pyro take on their way to adulthood and how they discover and deal
with their love for each other. It is a novel about what Joni
Mitchell calls "the dream's malfunction" and how we can learn to make
our own dreams when our heroes fail us. Other X characters and OC's
play prominent roles and the action begins before X1, continues
through the events of X2 and X3 and concludes in the aftermath of
that movie.

Chapter Summary: Bobby continues to follow Lance through the dark
woods of sexuality; John is inspired and terrified; Lance and John
lose control.

Betas: <http://lux_apollo.livejournal.com>lux_apollo and
<http://mo.fandomnation.com/fic/>mofic. Thank you for making me a
better writer.

Disclaimers: Marvel and 20th Century own this stuff but they need us
to make sense of it.

The Chapter can be found at:
<http://toothdemon.net/ttl/fanfic/dob/chapter11.html>http://toothdemon.net/ttl/f\
anfic/dob/chapter12.html

For earlier chapters, visit the DOB homepage:
<http://toothdemon.net/ttl/fanfic/dob>http://toothdemon.net/ttl/fanfic/dob

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

June's interview will be with UKTara, author of such stories as "The
First Move," "Parting Gifts," and "In the Face of Tragedy" among
others. You can read her stories at the new WRFA site
(http://www.wolverineandrogue.com/wrfa/index.php). People can suggest
questions through June 18th. Send them to me at the address below.

Thanks for your interest and enjoy the new movie!

Diane
deh@...

That's Entertainment
Rating: T for profanity
Characters: Logan, Scott, Darwin the Beagle, Lola the Siamese cat
Summary: Everyone defines fun differently.


http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3559562/1/

Enjoy!

Title: Days of Becoming, Chapter 11: "Two Small Rooms, Part I"

Author: Talktooloose

'Verse: X-Men movieverse

Warnings: Sexual situations, swearing, casual drug use, tragic
misunderstandings, calling teachers by their first names

Series Summary: This novel focuses mainly on the paths Iceman and
Pyro take on their way to adulthood and how they discover and deal
with their love for each other. It is a novel about what Joni
Mitchell calls "the dream's malfunction" and how we can learn to make
our own dreams when our heroes fail us. Other X characters and OC's
play prominent roles and the action begins before X1, continues
through the events of X2 and X3 and concludes in the aftermath of
that movie.

Chapter Summary: Bobby's not sure whether to be jealous of Kitty and
Lance until he's invited to share an experience with them which
changes everything. St. John thinks he's found a home, but you can't
be too careful.

Betas: lux_apollo and <http://mo.fandomnation.com/fic/>mofic with
additional comments by
<http://www.kuria.onomatopoetry.com/>kuriadalmatia. Thanks as always.

Disclaimers: Marvel and 20th Century own this stuff but they need us
to make sense of it.

The Chapter can be found at:
http://toothdemon.net/ttl/fanfic/dob/chapter11.html

For earlier chapters, visit the DOB homepage:
http://toothdemon.net/ttl/fanfic/dob

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Lola
by ridesandruns
Rating: T for profanity
Characters: Jean, Warren, Scott, Darwin the Beagle
Summary: Jean sizes up a new rival.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3513488/1/

Hi everybody,

I wanted to let you know that Deep_Salt_Water's author interview is
now up at the Wolverine and Rogue Fanfiction Archive
(http://www.wolverineandrogue.com/wrfa/categories.php?catid=9) for your
reading pleasure. So, swing by, take a look and enjoy!

Diane

Rachel--
I have not yet had the chance to read your story-- well, it just got posted,
after all-- but I wanted to write and let you know that as soon as I saw your
name, my heart did a little skip!!  I just love your work in general, and I have
really been missing Scott lately: there's been a dearth of fic; neither Whedon's
X-Men nor Ultimate really get Scott as far as I'm concerned, X-3 was the only
possible retelling that could make me miss X-2.....
thank you so much for letting us know about the "SUmmers Fling" .... I can't
wait to find some time, pour some wine, and spend an evening with Scott. : )

Tarrenn




-----Original Message-----
From: xmenmoviefanfic@yahoogroups.com
To: xmenmoviefanfic@yahoogroups.com
Sent: Mon, 2 Apr 2007 4:09 AM
Subject: [xmmff] Digest Number 1467





X-Men Movie Fanfiction
Messages In This Digest (1 Message)
1. New Fic: Sweet Home Alabama From: Rachel Martin
View All Topics | Create New Topic Message
1. New Fic: Sweet Home Alabama
Posted by: "Rachel Martin" rachel_martin64@...   rachel_martin64
Sun Apr 1, 2007 7:10 pm (PST)

Title: Sweet Home Alabama

http://rachel-martin64.livejournal.com/9829.html#cutid1

Author: Rachel Martin

Verse: Movieverse. Starts at the beginning of X3 and immediately goes AU.

Summary: Scott saves a life along the interstate and learns that no good
deed goes unpunished.

Rating: PG-13 for language. A mention of abortion that may offend some
readers.

Word Count: 7,437 (Complete)

Characters: Scott, Charles, Bobby, Ororo, Logan.

Disclaimer: The X-Men universe is the property of Marvel Comics and 20th
Century Fox. No money is being made and no infringement is intended.

Thanks to ridesandruns for the inspiration!

Notes: This story was written as part of the Summer(s) Fling challenge, at:
http://community.livejournal.com/summers_fling/profile Authors who have
posted so far: glastea, harmonyangel, lilacsigil, minisinoo, nagi_schwarz,
resolute, ridesandruns, roguewords, sionnain, st_aurafina, stubbleglitter,
tanya_ltp, xenokattz, zoe_chan

__________________________________________________________
Watch free concerts with Pink, Rod Stewart, Oasis and more. Visit MSN
Presents today.
http://music.msn.com/presents?icid=ncmsnpresentstagline&ocid=T002MSN03A07001


Back to top Reply to sender | Reply to group | Reply via web post
Messages in this topic (1) Recent Activity
  1 New Files
Visit Your Group
SPONSORED LINKS
X-men
Uncanny x-men
X-men evolution
Apprentice LA
Who will be next?
Play the Bix.com
faceoff to see!
Yahoo! Search
Find it now
Everything you
need in one place.
Yahoo! Movies
What's Hot Now
Check out the top
rated movies.
Need to Reply?
Click one of the "Reply" links to respond to a specific message in the Daily
Digest.Create New Topic | Visit Your Group on the Web
Messages | Files | Photos | Links | Database | Polls | Calendar
"A man lives not only his personal life, as an individual, but also, consciously
or unconsciously, the life of his epoch and his contemporaries."

Change settings via the Web (Yahoo! ID required)
Change settings via email: Switch delivery to Individual | Switch format to
Traditional
Visit Your Group | Yahoo! Groups Terms of Use | Unsubscribe

________________________________________________________________________
AOL now offers free email to everyone.  Find out more about what's free from AOL
at AOL.com.


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Title: Sweet Home Alabama

http://rachel-martin64.livejournal.com/9829.html#cutid1

Author: Rachel Martin

Verse: Movieverse. Starts at the beginning of X3 and immediately goes AU.

Summary: Scott saves a life along the interstate and learns that no good
deed goes unpunished.

Rating: PG-13 for language. A mention of abortion that may offend some
readers.

Word Count: 7,437 (Complete)

Characters: Scott, Charles, Bobby, Ororo, Logan.

Disclaimer: The X-Men universe is the property of Marvel Comics and 20th
Century Fox. No money is being made and no infringement is intended.

Thanks to ridesandruns for the inspiration!

Notes: This story was written as part of the Summer(s) Fling challenge, at:
http://community.livejournal.com/summers_fling/profile   Authors who have
posted so far: glastea, harmonyangel, lilacsigil, minisinoo, nagi_schwarz,
resolute, ridesandruns, roguewords, sionnain, st_aurafina, stubbleglitter,
tanya_ltp, xenokattz, zoe_chan

_________________________________________________________________
Watch free concerts with Pink, Rod Stewart, Oasis and more. Visit MSN
Presents today.
http://music.msn.com/presents?icid=ncmsnpresentstagline&ocid=T002MSN03A07001

April's interview will be with Deep_Salt_Water, author of such stories
as "Adrenaline," "Succor, "Ensnare," and "Instinct" among others. You
can read her stories at the new WRFA site
(http://www.wolverineandrogue.com/wrfa/index.php) and/or her LJ (
http://deep-salt-water.livejournal.com/).  People can suggest
questions through April 6th. Send them to me at the address below.

Thanks for your interest and enjoy the new movie!

Diane
deh@...

Title: Days of Becoming, Chapter 10: "Shivering with Anticipation"

Author: Talktooloose

'Verse: X-Men movieverse

Warnings: Kitty says a naughty word, but that's about it.

Series Summary: This novel focusses mainly on the paths Iceman and
Pyro take on their way to adulthood and how they discover and deal
with their love for each other. It is a novel about what Joni
Mitchell calls "the dream's malfunction" and how we can learn to make
our own dreams when our heroes fail us. Other X characters and OC's
play prominent roles and the action begins before X1, continues
through the events of X2 and X3 and concludes in the aftermath of
that movie.

Chapter Summary: The first day of school in Westchester! Exhilaration
and chaos! More mutants than you can shake a stick at! Lust.
Meanwhile in Boston, Mike meets the faces of fear. St. John, where
are you?

Betas: mofic and kuriadalmatia. Thanks as always.

Disclaimers: Marvel and 20th Century own this stuff but they need us
to make sense of it.

The Chapter can be found at:
http://toothdemon.net/ttl/fanfic/dob/chapter10.html

For earlier chapters, visit the DOB homepage:
http://toothdemon.net/ttl/fanfic/dob

Hi everybody,

I wanted to let you know that Gersemi's author interview is
now up at the Wolverine and Rogue Fanfiction Archive
(http://www.wolverineandrogue.com/wrfa/categories.php?catid=9) for your
reading pleasure. So, swing by, take a look and enjoy!

Diane

Title: Days of Becoming, Chapter 9: "Like a Wave"
Author: Talktooloose

Warnings: Explicit sexual contact (het, yet!), swearing, avowals of
innocence.

Series Summary: This novel focusses mainly on the paths Iceman and Pyro take
on their way to adulthood and how they discover and deal with their love for
each other. It is a novel about what Joni Mitchell calls "the dream's
malfunction" and how we can learn to make our own dreams when our heroes
fail us. Other X characters and OC's play prominent roles and the action
begins before X1, continues through the events of X2 and X3 and concludes in
the aftermath of that movie.

Chapter Summary: A short chapter about kissing. Three days before school
starts, Jean and Scott console themselves, Mike and Jubilee meet again and
sparks fly, Bobby and Kitty circle round the issue, Raheem and Andi get
heated, a homeless boy works to stay alive.

Betas: lux_apollo, mofic and kuriadalmatia. Thanks as always.

Disclaimers: Marvel and 20th Century own this stuff but they need us to make
sense of it.

The chapter can be found at:
http://toothdemon.net/ttl/fanfic/dob/chapter09.html

For earlier chapters, visit the DOB homepage:
http://toothdemon.net/ttl/fanfic/dob/

I've added a few essays to my website at http://mo.fandomnation.com/fic/

Although it is primarily an archive for my fiction, I occasionally publish
non-fiction there on slash-related topics, in a section called "Musings."  The
essays I've recently added are a collection of writings on lesbian and gay
parenting that I'm collectively calling "Gay Parenting 101."  I thought they
might be useful to slash writers who want to include some real life gay
parenting information in their stories, and might be of general interest to some
readers.

Topics in this series so far are:

How Do Gay Men and Lesbians Have Children?
What is the Legal Status of Same-Sex Parents?
Death and Divorce
Tools to Protect Gay and Lesbian Families
Coming Out Isn't Talking Dirty
Choosing a School Which Supports Gay Families


Drop by if you get a chance.  I'd also love to hear if anyone can suggest other
topics that I should include.

Mo
Mofic Website: http://mo.fandomnation.com/fic/
www.livejournal.com/users/mofic



________________________________________________________________________________\
____
Do you Yahoo!?
Everyone is raving about the all-new Yahoo! Mail beta.
http://new.mail.yahoo.com

February's interview will be with Gersemi, author of such stories
as "Feelin' You," "Kiss Me, I'm Irish," "Domestic Life" and
the "Facades" series among others. You can read her stories at the new
WRFA site (http://www.wolverineandrogue.com/wrfa/index.php) People can
suggest questions through February 9th. Send them to me at the address
below.

Thanks for your interest and enjoy the new movie!

Diane
deh@...

Life Lessons
by ridesandruns
Characters: Scott, Jean, Warren, Darwin the Beagle
Rating: T for profanity
Genre: Humor
Summary: Scott has a crisis of confidence

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3364673/1/

Enjoy!

Title: Days of Becoming, Chapter 8 - "Measured Response"
Author: Talktooloose
'Verse: X-Men movieverse
Pairing: Pyro/Iceman primarily and eventually but others as well, het and hom
Warnings: Swearing, I think. It means nothing to me, so I don't
really take note. Bubbling sexuality. Implied use of hand lotion as a
sexual aid. Bad puns.
Series Summary: This novel focuses mainly on the paths Iceman and
Pyro take on their way to adulthood and how they discover and deal
with their love for each other. It is a novel about what Joni
Mitchell calls "the dream's malfunction" and how we can learn to make
our own dreams when our heroes fail us. Other X characters and OC's
play prominent roles and the action begins before X1, continues
through the events of X2 and X3 and concludes in the aftermath of
that movie.
Chapter Summary: The characters react to the shooting in Pasadena. At
the mansion, they plan action; in Boston, a disillusioned Mike meets
an interesting girl; at the mutant youth meeting in New York, Bobby
makes a bold (or is it foolish) move. Bobby and Kitty wonder what's
up with all the spandex.
Betas: kuriadalmatia and lux_apollo. My betas' feedback really pushed
me to clarify both the action and the character intentions here.
Humble thanks.
Disclaimers: Marvel and 20th Century own this stuff but they need us
to make sense of it.


The Chapter can be found at:
<http://toothdemon.net/ttl/fanfic/dob/chapter08.html>http://toothdemon.net/ttl/f\
anfic/dob/chapter08.html

Earlier chapters are at the DOB homepage: http://toothdemon.net/ttl/fanfic/dob/

A comments link can be found at the end of the chapter. Your feedback
is appreciated.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

In my stories, as in the X-Men movie, Scott Summers is a mutant superhero who
also teaches high school.  The movie doesn't specify what he teaches, but I've
made him an English teacher.  Xavier's Academy is a small school with a large
variety of classes to choose from.  Consequently each of the teachers takes on
several different classes.  Scott is seen in my stories teaching courses ranging
from Shakespeare to Creative Writing to a poetry survey course, when he's not
off on a mission.  As Scott tells Logan in Canadian Nights, it's kind of a
strange job. "Sometimes I teach English, sometimes I save the human race," he
explains.

With Scott a major figure in most of my fiction, the stories tend to contain a
lot of literary quotes, most of them guided by Scott's tastes in literature
(which, strangely, mirror my own). It has been my practice to publish a
literature guide providing references for the quotes in each series, along with
URLs, where available, for those wishing to read the works quoted.

This series, in addition to literary content, raises some issues that might be
of interest to some readers in the Northstar subplot.  After the literary
descriptions there is some further information on homosexuality in Judaism, and
on the legal status of same-sex parents.

Poems

W.H. Auden.  "Villanelle"
A villanelle is a fairly uncommon form of poetry, the best known example of
which is Dylan Thomas’s “Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night.”  Auden’s
villanelle deals with a familiar theme – man’s inability to conquer time.  The
words are sparse and the images evocative.  Read the poem and some interesting
commentary on it, and on villanelles in general, at
http://www.cs.rice.edu/~ssiyer/minstrels/poems/677.html

T.S. Eliot. "The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock"
This poem is one of Scott’s favorites and shows up in most of my series. 
Although Cyclops is commanding and decisive in his work life (essential
characteristics for a Field Leader of a combat team) my Scott has difficulty
making decisions in his personal life, and relates to Prufrock for that reason. 
The title of the third story, “Decisions and Revisions,” in which Scott is
trying to decide whether or not to read the diaries, comes from Prufrock.  He
also quotes the poem with reference to Charles, saying that what’s revealed in
the diaries must be more the true Charles than when he “prepares a face to meet
the faces that he meets.”  Is he right?  I’m not sure.  I don’t think Scott’s
private self is more him than his public Cyclops persona or his English teacher
persona.  I don’t even think the private power dynamics between him and Logan
are just games, or he wouldn’t find them so compelling.  I believe that
Prufrock’s view is only one way of looking at self, and that people really are
all the different facets of their personality at the same time, not a real self
that’s private and a false one that’s shown.  Read the poem at
http://www.bartleby.com/198/1.html and decide who is the real Prufock.

Sylvia Plath. "Cut"
One of the premier poets of the twentieth century, Plath’s short and troubled
life is chronicled in her poetry.  Scott is teaching Plath during the poetry
lesson that Jean sits in on.  The poem they’re discussing begins “What a thrill
– my thumb instead of an onion.”  The imagery is astonishingly vivid in the
poem.  Read it at http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/cut/.

Carl Sandburg.  "Chicago"
Probably Sandburg’s best known poem, it was featured in my X2 fiction, where
Scott quotes it to Logan and the way it resonates with the Chicago Logan
remembers makes them realize he’s a lot older than they think.  In this series
it’s Charles who quotes from Chicago, saying that Scott was “under the terrible
burden of destiny.”  The poem can be found many places, including
http://www.bartleby.com/165/1.html.

William Shakespeare.  Sonnet 23
The Shakespearean sonnets figure largely in my stories.  Scott teaches
Shakespeare and is fond of several of the sonnets, in particular those addressed
to the Fair Youth, Will’s lover.  This is one of Scott’s favorites and it gives
the title to the sixth story.  It’s also one of the most accessible sonnets, as
the language seems almost modern.  Read it at
http://www.shakespeare-online.com/sonnets/23.html.

Sonnet 27
This sonnet is about long distance relationships, before there was such a term. 
It provides the title for the second story, featuring Jean-Paul and Adam (who
spent the early years of their relationship in different countries).  You can
find it at http://www.shakespeare-online.com/sonnets/27.html.

Sonnet 30
This sonnet, about melancholy and a tendency to self-pity, is one with pretty
universal appeal.  Will tells of how sad memories can kind of overpower someone,
resulting in tears and grief.  It ends on a much happier note, though, as he
thinks of his lover (the "Fair Youth", whose identity is subject of much
debate), saying:
"But if the while I think on thee, dear friend,
All losses are restored and sorrows end."
Adam references the poem when he says that "remembrance of things past" is
rushing in without summoning, when he begins to recall his night with Jake.  The
phrase "remembrance of things past" is also the title of the English translation
of Proust's novel, A la Recherche du Temps Perdu, which was featured in Safe
House.  The English title clearly comes from this sonnet, though, since it is
not a translation of the original French title.

Plays

William Shakespeare.  Hamlet.
This is my favorite play of all, and it shows up a fair amount in my fiction,
including Scott teaching a lesson about it in Commencement.  In this series, he
quotes Prince Hamlet’s first line in the play, “a little more than kin and a
little less than kind.”  It also gives the title to the ninth story.  Probably
Shakespeare's best known play, Hamlet has something for everyone:  love, death,
intrigue, theatricality, ghosts.  Read it at
http://www.shakespeare-online.com/plays/hamletscenes.asp.

King Lear.
One of the most emotionally affecting of the tragedies, Lear is a story of
parent/child betrayal – in both directions.  Charles quotes from the play in his
diary when he says that he wants Scott never to see what is written there lest
the bond be cracked ‘twixt son and father.  Read the play at
http://www.shakespeare-online.com/plays/learscenes.html.

Macbeth.
Scott quotes from Macbeth a few times in the course of the series.  Macbeth is
widely believed to be an unlucky play.  Superstitious actors often won't even
say the play's title except when necessary, referring to it instead as "the
Scottish play."  Read it if you dare at
http://www.shakespeare-online.com/plays/macbethscenes.asp

Oscar Wilde.  A Woman of No Importance.
Wilde’s epigrams and witty repartee make him eminently quotable.   Scott likes
him as a poet, too, and includes some of his poetry in the curriculum.  In this
series, the line “The only difference between the saint and the sinner is that
every saint has a past and every sinner has a future” gives the title to the
eighth story.  The Project Gutenberg version of the play can be found at
http://www.gutenberg.org/etext/854.


Novels

Philip Roth.  Portnoy’s Complaint
Breathtakingly original when it came out, Roth’s story of a neurotic American
Jew has been much copied, but never matched.  It’s brilliant in its
characterizations, screamingly funny, astute in observations of human foibles. 
It also exhibits the unthinking misogyny that mars Roth’s novels.  In
particular, this one gave us the stereotype of the smothering and
neuroses-inducing Jewish mother.  Adam identifies with Portnoy and mentions that
when he tells Jean-Paul “Love me, love my neuroses.”  Portnoy is not available
free online, but can be found in any public library or bookstore.


Miscellaneous Works and Some Speculations on Biblical Sex

Tanakh.  Two books of the Tanakh (Jewish bible) are referenced in Adam’s story
about his relationship with Yossi.  As Adam points out to Jean-Paul, the books
are also included in the Christian bible (although he mistakenly says “your
bible” to Jean-Paul and is corrected). The book of Leviticus, Chapter 18, is
referenced in the prescription against anal sex as “toevah” – abomination.  See
notes below on homosexuality in Judaism for more on that.

The story of David and Jonathan and their love for each other is told in Samuel,
Book 1, particularly in chapters 18 and 20.  When their relationship is first
introduced the narrative says that David loved Jonathan “as he loved his own
soul.” That line gives the title to the story in which Adam and Jean-Paul talk
about this.  In chapter 20 of Samuel, Book 1, David and Jonathan are seen
kissing and it says “they kissed each other and they cried with each other until
David got big.”  What does that mean?  We really can’t know, and different
people have different interpretations.

It’s always difficult to try to interpret something from a different time and
place and in a different language (what I gave above is a literal translation –
some translations have it as “David wept more” or “David exerted himself” or
“David exceeded”).  We need to be careful not to impose our cultural assumptions
on a different culture.  It’s pretty easy to jump to the conclusion that they
were lovers in a sexual sense just because they kiss and love each other and
Jonathan strips in front of David and gives him all his clothing and David “gets
big” when he kisses him.  Hmm.  It kind of sounds pretty sexual to modern ears.

On the other hand we also need to be careful not to impose our cultural taboos
on a different culture – in this case our internalized homophobia - and assume
that they could not be lovers because David is a hero.  But what about those
verses in Leviticus?  Is it likely that someone portrayed as hero would violate
them?

I think that’s a complicated question.  For one thing it’s unclear exactly what
is meant by “Mishkevay Isha” – the acts forbidden between men that men engage in
with women.  Still, for argument’s sake, let’s say that all sexual activity
between men is forbidden in Leviticus and deemed “toevah” - abomination.  The
simple fact is that many things are forbidden in one part of the Tanakh yet
shown engaged in by highly admirable people in other parts.  Sex with one’s
half-sister is similarly marked “toevah” – yet Abraham and Sarah are
half-siblings and their marriage is admired.  Similarly, sex with a woman and
then with her sister is forbidden as an abomination in Leviticus, but our
patriarch Jacob married Leah and then her sister Rachel.  So, it’s not at all
unusual to see these seeming contradictions, leading some to believe that
“toevah” is not a general category, but particular to time and place.

In addition, David is not an unambiguously heroic figure.  He is shown to have
some very human failings and is criticized in the text for them.  In particular,
his sexual irregularities are condemned (e.g. the whole episode with Bathsheva).
But his love for Jonathan is not presented as anything but wholly wonderful,
except in the eyes of Saul, who is suffering from severe mental illness.  So, we
would have to conclude either that their relationship was sexual and approved of
by the author of the book, or that it was not sexual at all and approved of. 
Different people come to different conclusions.

Read the story yourself and see what you think.  It’s easily available in both
Jewish and Christian bibles (but only the Jewish ones will give you the original
text as well as a translation).  Taken in its entirety, I think it takes a huge
effort of denial to not see David and Jonathan as in love and their love
expressed physically.  But there are still some people who think Will and the
Fair Youth weren’t lovers, either.

Shelby Foote. The Civil War: a narrative.  Considered by many to be the premiere
historian of the American Civil War, Shelby Foote was not trained as an
historian and, in fact, never completed a college degree.  His history reads
like a novel, yet is known for its attention to detail and its accuracy.  Havok
tells Storm that he was hooked on the Civil War from when he first read Shelby
Foote.

Tangential Issues

A couple of issues come up in the Jean-Paul and Adam subplot of the series that
I’d like to provide a little more information on.  Adam tells Jean-Paul a story
from his youth, of having been in love with a high school classmate, an Orthodox
Jew. Jean-Paul tells Alex that he and Adam are still working on getting legal
parental rights to Ezra (also alluded to in What’s Past is Prologue).   Some
further information and further reading/viewing opportunities on both of these
issues.

Homosexuality in Judaism
The different branches of Judaism approach most things differently and
homosexual behavior is not an exception.  Traditionally, Judaism has not been
accepting of any kind of sexual contact between two men or two women, and has
not acknowledged gay or lesbian relationships.  The more progressive branches of
Judaism – Reconstructionist and Reform Judaism – have long been at least
somewhat accepting of gay and lesbian couples, and have ordained out gay and
lesbian rabbis for some time.
It can, on the other hand, be very difficult to be a gay Orthodox Jew, and
Yossi’s accommodation to his homosexuality through hiding it and eschewing a
particular sex act, is a common one.  There are few, if any, Orthodox synagogues
where openly gay members are fully accepted.  Much more common is a strong
opprobrium attached to anyone thought to be gay.

The Conservative movement attempts to be the bridge between the more traditional
Orthodoxy and more progressive Reform movement.  It tries – as its name suggests
– to conserve what is of value in long held Jewish tradition while updating
practice as needed for a modern Jewish community.  As a movement, Conservative
Judaism is currently struggling with gay issues, and particular Conservative
shuls have a variety of approaches, from full acceptance to active
discrimination.  The official position of the movement includes approval of
acceptance of gay men and lesbians, but not acceptance of same sex kiddushin
(holy marriage) and also maintains the requirement that Yossi found so hard to
comply with, that men not engage in anal sex.

A couple of good resources on lesbians and gay men in Orthodoxy are widely
available.  The documentary film “Trembling Before G-d” offers a window into the
hidden lives of gay and lesbian Orthodox Jews.  Rabbi Steven Greenberg, an
openly gay Orthodox rabbi, has written a very accessible and fascinating book on
homosexuality and Judaism, called  Wrestling with G-d and Men: homosexuality in
the Jewish Tradition.

For a summary of the Conservative movement’s current struggle with
homosexuality, see my entry at http://mofic.livejournal.com/43675.html.
Extensive discussion of the issue can be found on the website of the Jewish
Theological Seminary at http://www.jtsa.edu/cjls/index.shtml.

Legal Status of Same-Sex Parents

As Jean-Paul says to Alex, he and Adam were unable to adopt together.  He
expresses this kind of simplistically, saying that because they could not be
legally married in “this benighted country” they could not jointly adopt.

The issue is somewhat more complicated than he mentions in a brief conversation
during training, but it’s quite true that marriage affords an enormous
assortment of rights and privileges in the United States, all of which are
denied to same-sex couples (and frequently taken for granted by opposite-sex
ones).  Adam adopted Ezra as if he were single, using a gay-friendly social
worker to do the home study and a gay- and mutant-friendly adoption agency.  Now
they are adopting again – going through another home study and another legal
procedure.  In New York State, where they live, it will likely take two years to
complete the second parent adoption, and it would be a good thing if the X-Men
start getting paid again, because it will cost them.   For more information on
the achieving legal rights for same-sex parents – mutant or otherwise – see my
Gay Parenting 101 series, particularly http://mofic.livejournal.com/38183.html 
What is the Legal Status of Same-Sex Parents?,
http://mofic.livejournal.com/38183.html Tools to Protect Gay and Lesbian
Families, Part 1, Second Parent Adoption, and
http://mofic.livejournal.com/39607.html   Tools to Protect Gay and Lesbian
Families, Part 2, Civil Union, etc.


Mo
Mofic Website: http://mo.fandomnation.com/fic/
www.livejournal.com/users/mofic



________________________________________________________________________________\
____
Food fight? Enjoy some healthy debate
in the Yahoo! Answers Food & Drink Q&A.
http://answers.yahoo.com/dir/?link=list&sid=396545367

I need to make contact with Alexander Summers very soon.  I’ve been watching him
on Cerebro and it appears that he is on the verge of coming into his powers.  I
don’t know yet what his gift is, but if it’s anything related to his brother’s
it could be disastrous for it to emerge in that facility.

Seeing him will not be simple, though.  The policy of the detention center is
that only parents or those they designate may visit.  The result is that he has
not had a single visitor during the time he has been there.  It’s highly
unlikely that his mother will provide me with the letter of reference I’d need
to gain entry as a visitor.  I could produce a letter purportedly from her, or
even use mind control to get her to sign one.  However, my concern is that if
they check with her, my deception will be revealed.

I think I’m better off to come up with a different pretext.  Perhaps I can pose
as a psychologist doing research on incarcerated youth and interview him as one
of a number of subjects.  I can certainly come up with some realistic-appearing
documents and provide some mind control convincing in addition, if necessary. 
Of course, I still run the risk that after the visit my stratagem will be
uncovered and they will find out that the documents are fraudulent, and maybe
even that I’m a mutant.  However, if that does happen, they won’t know that I
had a special interest in one of their inmates, so his mutant status will not be
revealed.  It’s important that whatever I do I do not endanger this young man
through my actions.

Another question I’m mulling over is what to say to him when I meet him.  I do
think I should reveal my true purpose in coming there, and let him know that I
am aware of his mutant status.  I will also offer him assistance in concealing
and controlling his powers.  But how much to tell him about my future plans? It
seems unlikely that I can arrange for an early release for him.  He still has
another two and a half years until he turns 18 and is no longer subject to a
sentence for a juvenile offense.  Will it be helpful to him to know that when
the time comes he will have somewhere to go, a safe environment for mutants?  Or
would the promise of a home so far off in time and place just underscore the
length of his imprisonment?  Perhaps I’m better off to suggest to him that I
might be able to secure his release before then.  Sometimes false hope is better
than none.

One thing I’ve decided not to tell him – that his brother is with me.  Nor will
I tell Scott that I’ve found his younger brother.  Scott has no idea that
Alexander was convicted of his father’s death.  I fear that that would be news
he would not handle well.  He might even want to go to Indiana and turn himself
in, telling the authorities that he, not his brother, was responsible for their
father’s death.  After all the work I’ve put into his training, where would that
leave me?

*******************************************************

Logan looked up from the page and shook his head, ruefully.  “Ain’t that a kick
in the pants.”

“Yeah.  After all that stuff before about making sure I never lacked for
parental love, I get to this.  You know how I told you I felt like he thought of
me as some sort of machine or tool before?  Well, reading this I felt like I was
a valuable racehorse or something – lots of money and effort put into it, can’t
let anything upset it.”  He smiled wryly.  “Sort of makes you wonder if the
‘parental love’ was just another part of the care and feeding.”

“Do you mean that?”

“I sort of do.  I mean, I don’t doubt that he had genuine concern for me, real
affection.  I lived with him for years, from when I was sixteen until his death.
I saw him in all sorts of situations, including really stressful ones.  We’ve
had serious disagreements, even major fights, and he always treated me with
affection and kindness, even when he made clear he had strong objections to the
choices I made.  There had to be something real behind that.

“But for Chrissakes!  The way he writes what he’s thinking when there’s nobody
to see it but him.  What he says about me.  And about Alex!  Lying to him for
expediency’s sake –‘false hope better than none,’ my ass.  In some sense this
has to be the more genuine Charles Xavier than the face he prepared to meet the
faces that he met, if you know what I mean. I wish I’d known this while he was
still alive.  I’d at least like to accuse him of being totally without human
feeling – see if that got a rise out of him.” He shook his head.  “You know it
really sucks being furious with dead people.  You can’t yell at them.”

Logan chuckled.  “I know the feeling, although I usually don’t want to yell,
just kill them.  Slowly.”  He clapped an arm round Scott’s shoulder.  “I’d kill
him for you, if he was alive.  If I thought that’s what you really wanted.  But
you don’t.”

“No.  I want him back, and not to kill him.  To yell at him, but not just that. 
To make him explain himself, to at least have him say he regrets some of this.”

“Like the song says – you can’t always get what you want.”

Scott sighed.  “But sometimes you get what you need. And, truth be told, I got
some of both, along with the answer to my riddle about whether he meant for me
to see these.  Look at this.”  He pulled the notebook out of the bottom of the
pile and opened it from the back, exposing the last entry.

**************************************************************
When I read over these journals I’m shocked by the emotions expressed in them. 
Or, often, by the lack of emotion.  Was I really so focused on my goal that I
lost sight of the people in front of me?  Lost sight of the children in my care?
I have given years of energy and effort into creating the X-Men, and I’ve given
my love and my care to these young people who comprise the team.  I ache with
fear for them whenever I send them into combat.  I don’t know if I could bear it
if they didn’t all come back.  I care for them so deeply I hardly know how to
express it.  And above all for Scott – my Field Leader, my shining son, my hero
who brings them back again and again.  May he never see what I wrote about him
in the earliest of these journals.  May he never know that there was a time when
I didn’t feel for him what I do now, lest the bond be cracked ‘twixt son and
father.
********************************************************************
“So he never meant for you to read them.”

“No.  I guess he forgot all about them.”

“How could he forget?”

Scott shrugged.  “I don’t know.   They were sitting there a long time.  Maybe he
put them there, put them aside, and thought he’d deal with them later.  But it
was fourteen years from that last entry until he died.  It looks like he didn’t
use that safe for anything else.  Maybe he totally forgot it existed.  If I
hadn’t been so anal about reading in order, I could have started at the end and
known he didn’t want me to read them before I made a decision.”  Ironic smile on
his face, he added, “But this way I got to hear some regret, at least.”

“Would you still have read them? If you’d known he didn’t want you to?”

“I don’t know.  I might have felt bound by his wishes, but I might have found
the curiosity outweighed that.  I’m kind of glad I didn’t have that decision to
make, that I read them in good faith, sort of, not realizing he didn’t want me
to.”

“Are you glad you read them?”

“Yeah.  I found out some hard stuff, but I also think it’s stuff I ought to
know.  Like you said, knowing’s better than not knowing.”  He sighed.  “It
doesn’t always feel like it, though.  Particularly the stuff about Alex.”

“So he did see him?”

“Yeah.  A few times.” He shuffled the journals, pulling out an earlier one. 
“You want to read it?”

“I think I’ve read enough.  Can you give me the Cliff Notes version?”

“Yeah, sure.”  Scott flipped pages as he spoke.  “Well, he did it like he said
he would – came up with a pretext of being a researcher studying juvenile
delinquents.  But he told Alex the truth – or some of it, anyway.   He told Alex
that he, Charles, was a mutant and that Alex was, too, and was beginning to
manifest.  He offered to help Alex suppress his powers until he could control
them.”

“He could do that? Suppress mutant powers?”

“Yeah, through mind control.  He did that with Jean’s telepathy until she was
ready to handle it.”

“And your brother took him up on his offer?”

“No, but Charles did it anyway.”

“How come?”

“How come Alex didn’t want him to suppress his gift or how come he did it
anyway?”

“Both.”

“Well, Alex didn’t want him to because he didn’t trust him.  And I can’t say I
blame him.  As far as Alex was concerned, Charles was just this strange guy who
shows up and starts talking about mutants as the next step of evolution and
offering him a place and a life’s mission when he got out of that prison.  Alex
couldn’t relate to any of it.  I doubt he was even convinced yet that he *was* a
mutant. As Charles tells it, he was completely dubious.  He was fifteen years
old and in prison for a crime he hadn’t committed, spending his time with kids
who were a whole hell of a lot older and tougher than he was.  He was scared for
his life a lot of the time.”  He patted the journal.  “It’s all in here.  Alex
wasn’t buying what Charles was selling.  He didn’t want a vision for a mutant
future – he wanted practical help right then and there.  Charles suggested he
might get him out early like he said.  Well, false hope wasn’t better than none
– it just convinced Alex that Charles has grand plans but doesn’t deliver.  And
he was still hoping,” and here his voice got soft, “that I’d show up and rescue
him.”  Scott sighed again.  “I think if he’d told Alex I was with him, if he’d
told me about Alex – it might all have come out differently.”

“Why didn’t he?”

“He didn’t tell me because he worried it would upset me.  A few more of those
‘high strung race horse’ passages around that whole issue.  He worried I’d want
to spring him, that I wouldn’t wait for his sentence to be over.  And he’s
right.  We could have done it, too.  No one knew who the X-Men were then.  We
could have gotten him out.  I would have done it, with Charles’s blessing or
without.  Jean, Hank, Warren – they would have done what I told them to.  They
wouldn’t have let Alex just rot there, no matter what Charles said, not if I
told them what happened.  And I would have – as ashamed as I was of what
happened to my father, I could have put that aside if I’d known there was a
chance to save Alex, if I’d known he’d taken the rap for me.  It all would have
been different.”

“Why didn’t he tell Alex you were with him?”

“He’s less clear on that.  He thought he could win him over without it.  He
worried, I think, that Alex would want to talk to me and then we get back to
objection number one:  don’t upset the Field Leader with trivialities like the
knowledge that his brother confessed to murder on his behalf and took his place
in prison.” Scott shook his head.  “You know, I just about hate him when I think
of that.  I’ve forgiven him for a lot, including letting Sabretooth and Toad out
and all that led to.  And since one thing it led to was me being kidnapped and
almost killed, it felt personal. It was a hard thing to forgive, but I did.  I
got over it.  I don’t know if I’ll get over this one.  I’ve got a feeling that
forgiving dead people is harder than forgiving the living.”  He shrugged. 
“Well, I’ll see, since I’ve likely got to do both.”

“Who else you mad at?”

Scott didn’t answer directly.  “I *hate* being lied to.  That he made bad
decisions – or at least decisions I view as bad ones – that I can accept.  But
that he knew about Alex all that time and never told me, that’s harder.  As hard
as reading that stuff about how he made me *wait* to be desperate enough. 
Charles was lying to me every day, for years.  He was lying implicitly most of
the time and explicitly when he talked about how sorry he was that he hadn’t
found me earlier.  You should have heard him – right after he got sick – telling
me how he felt he failed me.  Shit!  It was all lies.”

“You think so?”

“Not exactly.  I’ve been wondering why he said that stuff.  It was kind of out
of the blue.  I think maybe it was his way of apologizing for a lot of it, for
things he felt I might not forgive, things he was too scared to disclose. 
Particularly then – he was so sick and vulnerable and dependent on me.  He
wasn’t going to tell me right then how he’d lied, he wouldn’t want to risk my
anger and my rejection.  And later – well, he didn’t really have a later.”

“He had enough time to tell you where your brother was before he died.”

“Yeah, he did.  And that’s going to be the hardest to forgive him for.”  Scott
slammed the book.  “Damn you, Charles Xavier!” he said to it, softly.

“So, who else are you mad at?  Me?”  Scott shook his head.  “Alex?”

“Yeah.”

“What happened with him?”

“Well, Charles visited him from time to time, trying to win him over.  And then
right before his release, trying to get him to come here, join the team.”

“He wouldn’t?  Why not?  Where’d he have to go?”

“That was Charles’s hope – that he’d come since he didn’t have anywhere to go.
He’d released the control on Alex’s powers by then. He offered to bring him back
with him.  .  Alex said he needed to go home first.  Charles gave him $500 to
tide him over and for transportation, and told him to meet him in Westchester in
a couple of weeks.”

“And your mother gave him a chilly reception?”

“She undoubtedly would have, if he’d gone to her, but he didn’t.  He never went
back to Goodland. He and Charles’s money disappeared.  I’d say without a trace,
except he’s easy to trace.  From petty crimes to less petty ones to major
felonies within five years.  And then in and out of prison until last year, when
Adam found him for me.”

“And you sold your soul and the X-Men to get him out.”

“Yeah.”

“And he acted like he knew nothing of the Professor except what he’d read in the
papers.  He made you feel as guilty as he could for what happened to him.”

“Exactly.”

Logan didn’t say anything for a long time.  “Let me know if you want him dead,”
was all he finally said.

“Thanks, but I can handle him.”

*****************************************************************
Scott found Alex in the Danger Room that evening, practicing solo.  “You lied to
me,” he said, without preamble.

“What about?”

Scott laughed, short and hollow.  “Too many lies to know?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Why didn’t you tell me Charles had offered you a place on the team, offered to
help you years ago?”

“Oh that.”

“Yeah that.”

He sighed.  “Look, I could make up some story, but you probably wouldn’t believe
it.  I might as well tell you the truth.”

“I’d appreciate that.”

“I thought you wouldn’t help me if you knew.  I thought you’d figure I had my
chance and I blew it – blew the money he gave me for transportation and the
chance at a new life.  I thought you’d leave me there.”  He looked at Scott
sidelong.  “Was I right?”

“Yes.  No.  I don’t know.  It wasn’t easy getting you out of there.  I might
have told you to wait it out.  I might have been more wary of taking you on.  I
don’t know.”

“Scott, I don’t know if you can believe this, but I didn’t know about you.  He
never told me you were with him.  It’s hard to believe, I’m sure, but he
didn’t.”

“I believe you.  Not because you’re so convincing, but because I know it’s true.
I found old diaries of Charles’s.  That’s how I know about any of this. I hate
him for not telling me he’d found you, for not telling you he’d found me.  For
keeping us apart.”

“If I’d known, I would have come with him in a heartbeat.  I would have gone
anywhere to join you then.  But to be with some weird old guy who wanted to put
together some kind of mutant army?  It just seemed crazy.  I figured I’d make my
own way.”

“Through armed robbery, among other things.”  Alex didn’t answer.  “So why are
you joining a mutant army now?  I’m as crazy as he was, you know, if that’s the
measure of crazy.  I’m trying to fulfill his legacy.  Why come with me?”

“It was a way to get out.”

“And you could have disappeared again once I got you out.  You still can. 
You’re not locked in here.”

“Are you telling me to go?”

“No, I’m asking why you’re staying.  Why you’ve stayed all these months.”

“Because you’re my brother.  You and I are all the family we’ve got, Scott.
There’s a connection between us, something important.”

“Blood is thicker than water?”

“Nah, not judging by our parents, anyway.  But there’s something, something real
between you and me.  What about this?”  Plasma force emerged from Alex’s hand,
shimmering in the air as it moved towards Scott, leaving a tingling sensation in
his chest where it landed.  “You’re the only person that does no damage to.  I’m
the only one that can see your eyes.  Doesn’t that mean anything to you?”

“It does.  I don’t know what.  When we met – in that prison – and you told me to
take off my glasses, it did something to me.  I hadn’t seen a human being up
close and in color in almost twenty years.  You’re the only person in the world
I can look in the eye.  It’s something, something... transcendent. Transcends
the time we were apart, anyway.  But it’s not everything.  I can’t stand to be
lied to.”

“I’m telling you the truth now.”  Neither said anything for a moment.  “I’ve got
nowhere to go.  I’m not saying I’m comfortable here.  I’m not saying I’m some
sort of model mutant like you.  But I’m staying.  And I’m trying.”

“Yeah, Storm says you’re making good progress lately.”

“Does that count for something?”

“I don’t know how much.  You’re a pain in the ass most of the time, Alex.  Half
the team has complained about you to me.  And the other half probably wants to
and thinks they shouldn’t because you’re my brother.”

“Do you want me to leave?”  Alex looked more serious, more sincere, than Scott
remembered seeing him since he’d joined up.

“No,” he replied after a pause.  “I want you to stay.  I want you stop lying to
me and I want you to stop being a pain in the ass.  Do you think you can manage
that?”

Alex grinned at him.  “Time will tell.”

“Time will say nothing but I told you so.”

“Is that from Shakespeare or something?”

“Wrong century.  Auden.”

“You know I don’t know that high brow shit.”

“What did I expect from someone who spells ‘havoc’ with a ‘k’?”

The serious look came back to Alex’s face.  “I am sorry I lied.  I’d do it again
if it meant getting out, I won’t tell you otherwise.  I’m just sorry it was you
I had to do it to.  And I am trying.”

“You’re very trying – at least that’s what half the team tells me.”

“Ha ha.”

“Okay.  We’ll try, too – try to make an X-Man out of you.”

“Thanks.”

“Don’t let me catch you lying to me again.” He paused and added, “I get why you
did.  It’s certainly more Charles’s fault than yours.  He should have told you. 
He should have told me about you.  I’m furious with him that he didn’t.”

“But I’m easier to yell at.”

“Indeed.  Maybe easier to forgive, too.  We’ll see.  I want to let go of this. 
I’m willing to try.  ‘What’s gone and what’s past help should be past grief.’ I
believe that; I want to live by it.”

“Auden again?”

“Shakespeare, this time.”

“I give up.”

“Good idea.”

Scott took off his glasses, looked straight into his brother’s eyes, and smiled.



Mo
Mofic Website: http://mo.fandomnation.com/fic/
www.livejournal.com/users/mofic



________________________________________________________________________________\
____
Yahoo! Music Unlimited
Access over 1 million songs.
http://music.yahoo.com/unlimited