If you've spent any time waiting to audition with dozens
of other actors going in before you... you know what it
is to feel the ebb and flow of that crucial feeling of
confidence. And you know that confidence is the actor's
special need.

We all know, almost as if by osmosis, that it is the key
to everything. Confident actors win auditions. Confidence
is coin of the realm in show business. We know it.

Our problem is that no one is explaining how we can
become confident. Sure, we've heard all the stories -
Lincoln lost every election, Edison tried over a thousand
times to invent the light bulb, Harrison Ford struggled
for over a decade -- yeah, yeah, we know. We get it.

Persistence.

But, the thing those stories don't tell us is... HOW?

How did Lincoln, Edison and Ford face all that failure
and remain confident?

Did Lincoln stand in front of a mirror chanting that he
was worthy while people told him to go back to his log
cabin.

Did Edison wear a t-shirt that said, "What I really want
to do is invent?"

Did Ford recite life-affirming haikus every morning of
the ten years he worked as a carpenter -- and watched
lesser actors rise to stardom?

We already know they DID it ... we just don't know HOW
they did it.

How people become confident is left out of these damn
stories. Actors already know that we should be confident
people... but would someone please show us HOW to do
that?

Well, as it happens someone has written a book that is
a seminal work in this area. Her name is Rosabeth Moss
Kanter, she's a professor at Harvard Business School, and
her book is called (cleverly enough) "Confidence" (Crown
Business Press, 2004).

As most of you know, I usually "plug" my own book (I
know, I know, more than I should) but this time I'd like
to urge all actors to get a copy of Ms. Kanter's book.

Kanter has taken the time to investigate the "how" and
written it down in a clear, straight-forward way. She
started by interviewing lots of athletes and business
leaders and in the resulting study she has managed to
organize and illustrate the behaviors, habits, attitudes,
skills and core beliefs of highly confident people. (That
highly confident people are highly successful is a given
... again, we know it.)

The good news? Anyone can become confident.

The bad news? It takes a lot of work.

Pick me up platitudes are fine, but the real work
involved, in order to become confident, is what sets the
pro apart from the 'wannabe.' Ms. Kanter's premise has
it that confidence is not simply a frame of mind or
attitude but a collection of habits, characteristics and
behaviors that set events in motion in one of two
directions: winning and losing.

Winners act and react to their world in one way and
losers in another. Most importantly she points out that
there are concrete, identifiable, signposts along the way
-- signposts which determine what path you are on.

For instance:

Confidence that isn't supported by hard work and
realistic expectations is nothing but wishful thinking.

Success comes with its own problems of sustaining and
improving results.

Confidence is complicated and cannot be taken for granted.

There are different kinds of confidence for different
kinds of attainments.

And those are just a few of the important insights that
are illustrated by real-world examples in this study.

In order to help as much as I can, in a short article,
here's a short list of habits I've paraphrased from the
book. Habits that you will always see in confident (and
therefore successful) -- oh, let's say ACTORS, for
instance:

1. Confident pros are open to criticism or suggestions.
2. Confident pros are honest about their own abilities
and limitations.
3. Confident pros seek the advice and input of others.
4. Confident pros learn from their mistakes.
5. Confident pros set realistic goals, and have realistic
expectations.
6. Confident pros are willing to work hard to achieve
their goals, and DO.
7. Confident pros take personal responsibility for their
fate.
8. Confident pros embrace new challenges and take
reasonable risks.
9. Confident pros replace bad habits with good habits
10. Confident pros EXPECT good things to happen.

The opposite side of the theatrical coin is the perennial
wannabe. Almost precisely wrong habits and behaviors.

1. Wannabe's react defensively to criticism
2. Wannabe's are not honest about their abilities or
limitations.
3. Wannabe's shun the advice or input of others.
4. Wannabe's tend not to learn much from their mistakes.
5. Wannabe's set unrealistic goals and have unrealistic
expectations.
6. Wannabe's use problems (it's hard) as an excuse not
to try.
7. Wannabe's blame others for things that go wrong.
8. Wannabe's avoid new challenges and want to play it
safe.
9. Wannabe's repeat self defeating habits over and over
again.
10. Wannabe's expect the worst and often get it.

If you are interested in learning about the "how" of
confidence I recommend Ms. Kanter's book unreservedly.

This is a book every actor should read who wants good
instruction on having confidence and keeping it.

One caveat: what might look easy to do, on the surface,
is often the hardest thing to actually attain.

Have a safe New Year's Eve and a prosperous New Year.

Much Success,

Bob

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